6. An Argument for Creating Man-Made, Targetable Tropical Cyclones

Good morning, fuckers. Did you fucking miss me?

Because wouldn't you love to have a pet cyclone park itself over the headquarters for the fucked-up screwball military junta that runs Burma? (I'm not calling it Myanmar, fuckers.)

They can put down a protest in the blink of an eye, but can't be bothered to help their own goddamned people.

Rather than feed their people with the fucking rice they produce, they'd rather have the money from the sale of it, thank you very fucking much.

There are Marines off the coast? Fucking send them in! Fucking shoot the assholes running that shithole of a country! Blow them off of the fucking face of the fucking earth! Install a fucking puppet government! Go Western fucking Imperialism!! Fucking Imperialize, already!! What the fuck are we waiting for?! A fucking invitation?

Fuck the fucking fucks that fucking run the fucking government of Burma. Fuck 'em all. Fuck 'em over. Fuck the world. Take no fucking prisoners.

Hope you enjoyed this glimpse into my sensitive side.

5. Fucking Assholes of the Day.

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

4. Ironic Dumbshit of the Day

Today is a special fucking day.

Today, without warning or fanfare, I am not only establishing a new blog, but also establishing a new Internet award: The Ironic Dumbshit of the Day.

Today's first winner is this jackass named Steve from enableate.com.

His winning post was this one, entitled The Hubris Of Man:

Instapundit directs me

Right away, you know its gonna be good!

to this report advising which patients should be given care in the event of a massive pandemic where medical resources must be conserved. I want you to think about this for a second because this is the same kind of reasoning we see in global warming.

Oh, fuck. Where did I put my thinking cap? Okay, here it is. Now, medical resources and global warming. Medical resources and global warming. My thinking cap must not be working right.

A groups of experts,

Nope, thinking cap works correctly. A fucking groups of experts.

who have no actual experience working in a massive pandemic flu,

Last one was in 1968-1969.

have posited a set of outcomes, developed a set of guidelines for operation in those hypothetical outcomes, and then argue these guidelines should be applied to all hospitals that serve the 300 million or so people of this country.

Okay.

Can you imagine the kind of pride it takes to earnestly make these suggestions. First, these so-called experts have no actual experience with a national or global pandemic. It’s simply assumed they do because their ‘expertise’ in some field appears to have some vague association with determining hospital policy during a catastrophe. However, given the fact that not a single one of them have ever actually been in a national or global pandemic, its hard to really see how their current expertise, whatever that may be, is more useful in foreseeing the events of such a pandemic, or that they would have more insight in setting policy then just a typical mix of people forced into that situation.

Blink, blink, blink, blink. Back the fuck up.

This is from the report he cites:

The suggested list was compiled by a task force whose members come from prestigious universities, medical groups, the military and government agencies. They include the Department of Homeland Security, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and the Department of Health and Human Services.

From what we've read of Steve so far, its clear by the tone of his post that he doesn't like the fact that a group of people were put together to solve a problem that they had no direct experience with or he doesn't like the fact that they came up with guidelines that apply to national healthcare, as a whole, in event of pandemic flu.

Or both.

Nevermind that universities study it, medical groups are the source of the best practical knowledge of it, the military has to extensively deal with epidemiology of their servicemembers that are deployed overseas as well as the more obvious fact that they're experts in mass casualty scenarios, and that it's part of the core missions of DHS, CDC and DHHS.

If you want to be prepared for pandemic flu on a national level, tell me, who would you have write the report instead? Or do you not want to be prepared for pandemic flu?

Its bad that these experts are riding on the coat tails of an association between their expertise and a perception that they are qualified prognostications, but then they suggest guidelines in which the entire medical system should be behave in this situation. Instead of taking a position that each facility should set it’s own policy so as to adapt to the conditions it finds itself in, these ‘experts’ wish to apply a set of rubrics that all facilities across the whole country, if not the world should follow. Its in this suggestion that their hubris becomes manifest. It’s one thing to shoot the shit with your colleagues about how the medical system will behave in a pandemic, but an entirely different thing when you actually argue for setting policy based on your prognostications. These experts think their conjecture is so likely to be true, that it’s best to advise how thousands upon thousand of medical facilities should respond to some future catastrophe.

It’s even worse than that. These same experts believe that the application of their rubrics will result in a better outcome than the collective action of all the medical professionals in the actual pandemic adapting their decisions to match the context of the local community. These experts are suggesting a command economy approach to managing a pandemic will be superior to a free market approach. History has really shown that to be true.

Read the last sentence again. He makes a Freudian slip, and ends up contradicting himself. This is the money shot of the whole deal. This is where we get to what makes Steve tick. He's-a-free-market-at-all-costs-libertarian. A heartless douchebag, in other words.

Hospitals, you dumbfuck, need to not operate in a vacuum during a crisis such as pandemic flu. That's what this planning alleviates. They need a way to share data, equipment and personnel amongst each other. Taking the opinion that hospitals just need to figure it out on their own is counterproductive and at the end of the day, would cost their everyday patients more money in increased healthcare costs as the hospitals would need to charge more money to cover all of the extra equipment and personnel they had to cover for a pandemic. This is not analogous to global warming in any way. It is analogous to the stupid shitheads that don't get their kids vaccinated.

These experts know what no one can possibly know and believe their rubrics will be superior to managing the pandemic then medical professionals that develop an intimate understanding of of the catastrophe and adapt as context demands. Such belief is the very definition of hubris.

Stated without a hint of irony by a man with no subject matter expertise what-so-fucking-ever who believes his rubric is superior than the one created by the people whose job it is to do so.

Congratulations, Steve! You are the winner of the inaugural Ironic Dumbshit of the Day award. Now go fuck off, you douchebag libertarian.

3. Who the fuck is this asshole?

You may be wondering that. The answer to that, as you may have guessed, is that it ain't none of your damn business who I am. No matter what my name is or what I do for a living, my ideas and thoughts are at least as worthy as yours, or anyone you suck off, jack off, fuck off, like, love, hate, admire or curse.

I like to use profanity. If you don't like my use of profanity, mayhaps you should consider reading some other fucking blog.

Blogging is fucking therapeutic. It's fucking therapeutic and I'm stressed the hell out, all day, every goddamned day, and I'm going to use this as a stress release.

This is going to be some serious fucking fun.

2. Fixed.

THIS IS FUCKING MINIMA, ASSHOLES!!

1. What The Fuck.

This is fucking 'minima'? This isn't no fucking minima. I'll show you minima, just a sec.